The Night Before Crisis

'Twas the night before crisis, and all through the house, not a program was
working, not even a browse.

The coders were wrung out, all too mindless to care, Knowing chances of
slippage had nary a prayer.

The users were nestled all deep down in their beds, while visions of inquiries
danced over their heads.

When out in the lobby there rose such a clatter, that I sprang from my tube to
check out the matter.

And just what to my wondering eyes should appear but a super programmer, a
stranger to fear.

More rapid than eagles his packages they came, and he whistled and shouted and
called them by name.

"On Inquiry and Add, On Update, On Delete! On Batch Jobs and Closing, On All
Functions Complete!"

His eyes were glazed over, his fingers oh so lean, from weekends and
all-nighters in front of a screen.

With a wink of his eye and a twist of his head he soon gave me to know I had
nothing to dread.

He uttered not a word, but went straight to his work turning specs into code -
then he turned with a jerk,

and caressed with his finger the very last key - why, the system came up, and
it worked perfectly!

The Updates updated; the Deletes deleted; The Inquiries inquired, the Closing

He tested each whistle and he tested each bell; with nary an Abend - it had all
gone so well.

The system was finished, the tests were concluded; the client's last changes
were even included!

And the client exclaimed, with a snarl and a taunt: "It's just what I asked
for, but it's not what I want!"