Signs of life Maternity Clothes Shop: We are open on labor day Non-smoking area: If we see you smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action On Maternity Room Door: "Push,Push,Push" On a Front Door: Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog Optometrist's Office: If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place Scientist's Door: Gone Fission Taxidermist Window: We really know our stuff Podiatrist's Window: Time wounds all heels Butcher's window: Let me meat your needs Used Car Lot: Second Hand cars in first crash condition Sign on Fence: "Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive" Car Dealership: The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment Muffler Shop: No appointment necessary. We'll hear you coming Hotel: "Help!" We need inn - experienced people Butcher's Window: Pleased to meat you Auto Body Shop: May we have the next dents? Sign in an office: We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left Veterinarians Waiting Room: Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay! Music Teacher's Door: "Out Chopin" At the Electric Company: "We would be delighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don't, you will be" Beauty Shop: Dye now! Garbage Truck: We've got what it takes to take what you've got Computer Store: "Out for a quick byte" Restaurant Window: Don't stand there and be hungry, come in and get fed up Bowling Alley: Please be quiet. We need to hear a pin drop Cafeteria: Shoes are required to eat in the cafeteria. Socks can eat any place they want Music Library: Bach in a minuet Funeral Home: Drive carefully, we'll wait General Conference: Welcome! We're generally in conference.