Nuclear powerd PC

Kevin Korb's Jokes: New Option for the IBM Compatible PC


New Option for the IBM Compatible PC

Now you can get a single-board nuclear reactor that supplies stand-by power for 12 years!

The QBX-1 nuclear reactor card, available on a full-length plug-in card for the IBM or compatible, provides back-up power for up to 12 years. When the card senses a power failure, explosive charges (bolts) eject moderator and control rods from the reactor interior, within 20 mmsec, bringing the reactor to its fully-rated output of 20 KW, in less than one millisecond! Over its 12-year active life, the reactor's power decreases by 25%, to 15 KW.

Integral heat fans provide convection cooling of the reactor's 500W power dissipation while the reactor is in "stand-by" position. If your computer cannot furnish the 400 cubic feet per second of forced air for cooling, consider buying the manufacturer's heavy-water cooling jacket and stainless steel pump module, which fits conveniently under a desk, or workbench. Latches on each side of the reactor module let you quickly swap the radioactive core, should you need to replace it. An optional circular viewing port of lead glass lets you view the reactor's internal assemblies, and also functions as a 10-million candlepower nightlight.

To protect users from undue radiation, each card contains a shielding kit, comprised of five self-adhesive, lead-plated, high-density, concrete panels, and 20 radiation-monitoring film badges. The lead-plated panels mount to the inside of your computer enclosure, insuring the reduction of harmful gamma rays, which cause soft errors to floppy disks, and RAM data. For more protection, consider the manufacturer's 200-foot extension cords for monitors and keyboards.

Because the card can supply more than enough power for the standard computing station, you can sell excess power to your utility company, as provided by law. An add-on phasing and metering kit (PMK-1) lets you connect your reactor to the local power grid. Each PMK-1 kit includes standard power sale contracts and Rural Electrification Board rules and regulations.

Although not required everywhere, each reactor includes a standard 23 volume site evacuation plan. The plan includes forms to allow you to register the name and address of your reactor site with the Nuclear Regulatory Commission. As an option, the seller supplies the plan on MS-DOS compatible diskettes, in ASCII format. User-friendly templates let you type in the data allowing your word processor to create a complete, printed document.

Reactor prices start at $12 million (US). Please allow six years for delivery. (Prices do *not* reflect union considerations, or include cost overruns).

Please mail your cashier's check, or money order, with payment in full to:

Nukes R Us
P.O. Box U-235
White Sands, NM 43210

From Shareware Magazine, p44, Oct-Nov 1988.