You might be a redneck Jedi if...
- Your Jedi robe is a camouflage color.
- You have ever used your light saber to open a bottle of Boone's
  FarmStrawberry Hill.
- You think the best use of your light saber is picking your teeth.
- At least one wing of your X-Wing is primer colored.
- There is a blaster rack in the back of your landspeeder.
- You have bantha horns on the front of your landspeeder.
- You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.
- You can find no grammatical errors in the way Yoda talks.
- You think that Stormtroopers are just KKK members with really goodsheets.
- A peaceful meditation session is one without gas.
- You can levitate yourself using a force from within, but not THE Force.
- Your master ever said "My finger you will pull..hmmm?"
- You have ever had an X-wing up on blocks in your yard.
- You ever lost a hand during a light-saber fight because you had to spit.
- The worst part of spending time on Dagoba is the dadgum skeeters.
- Wookies are offended by your B.O.
- You have ever used the Force to get yourself another beer so you didn't have
  to wait for a commercial.
- You have ever used the Force in conjunction with fishing/bowling.
- You have ever used a light saber to clean fish or open a non-twist-off
  bottle of beer.
- Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son come on over t' the darkside,
  it'll be a hoot."
- You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to
  get the barbeque grill to light.
- All those mutants in the bar at Mos Eisley are your relatives.
- You are related to most of them in more than one way at once.
- Your favorite leisure-time activity is 'droid-tipping.
- Your pal Yoda has a still out back.
- When Darth Vader informs you of his diabolical plan to destroy your planet,
  your response is, "Well, kiss my grits."
- You have two or three nonfunctional 'droids sitting on your front porch.
- You live in a converted Jawa crawler up on blocks.
- You figure Grand Moff Tarkin'll look the other way as long as he gets his cut.
- You and your buddies like to tool around at night looking for Sand people to
  beat up.
- You think Princess Leia's hairstyles are conservative.
- Luke's call-sign is Red Five; Biggs' call-sign is Red Three; your call-sign
  is Red Man.
- Since you can't open the window, your X-wing has a spittoon.
- Your landspeeder has chromed headers.
- The Millenium Falcon looks like just the ticket for smuggling that 'shine
  into Andromeda galaxy.
- The master's wisdom is, "Do. Or do not. But don't git caught."
- You've spent a lot of time in Empire prison cells, but mostly for being
  drunk and disorderly.
- So what if Princess Leia *is* your sister?